Starting Over Talk - Peer Coaching Support Site

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We begin with the ladies going out to a restaurant for breakfast together. Jessica says she is excited to be getting out as a group acting like normal girlfriends having fun and hopes they will be able to get through it without any controversy. Jill says she didn’t get to bed until 5 am because she was working on her necklaces and is not thrilled about going out. As they are sitting at the table, TJ begins to read a newspaper and at the same time a couple behind them begins to fight. They are loud enough to be heard by the houseguests who try to ignore it at first. Allison says that she attracts controversy. She laughs nervously and wonders if they know how loud they are. Lisa rubs her shoulders and tells her to relax. Jill laughs, Allison said she would like to go over and kick the woman’s a**.

Everyone but TJ is overhearing the argument and laughing about it. Jessica says something to TJ about her reading the paper and how she is not interacting with the group. TJ looks stern and says she feels bad for the woman, that she is not judging them and thinks the others are making fun of them. TJ then goes over to the couple’s table and tries to bond with the woman, saying she is also a loud person, and did she know everyone could hear her. The houseguests are shocked that TJ did this. Lisa says to the camera that TJ thinks she is Dr. Phil and she wants to feel the woman’s pain. The woman said she was mortified and TJ said yes, she would be too. TJ comes back to the table and refuses to tell anyone what she said to the couple. She said again she wasn’t going to judge them and Jill said no, you’d rather go over there and do it in person. Allison told TJ they were not making fun of the couple. Jessica said she knew they couldn’t get through breakfast without some drama.

Next at group meeting, Rhonda asks how breakfast went. Lisa talks about the couple at the table and how they were arguing and that TJ went over to intercede. Rhonda then tells them that the couple was a plant by Rhonda to see how the houseguests react to controversy. TJ then said that Allie made a comment and then Allie and Lisa started laughing and it made her uncomfortable. Rhonda said honey, you were uncomfortable anyway. Jessica tells TJ she wasn’t uncomfortable until she went over there and spoke to them. Jill tells TJ that if she started reading with a group of people, that says I don’t want to be bothered with you. Rhonda said that TJ made a decision for the entire table, cutting her friends off and decided to make a new friend while leaving them behind. TJ begins to get upset. She says that she is trying to learn, she doesn’t know what to do. If she says she doesn’t know something, then she’s avoiding. If she puts up boundaries then it looks like she’s being defensive, if she says she’s uncomfortable then she makes everyone else uncomfortable. Jill tells TJ to tell the truth. She begins to break down completely. She feels she is being rejected at every turn and not supported by her housemates. Rhonda says that is your perception.

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