Starting Over Talk - Peer Coaching Support Site

I really do understand what you are saying Debby, but I have to say that it would be frustrating being married to Matt at times... He always has some sort of project going on.... He even describes himself as a dreamer...

Amy is the one who does the day to day managing of the house and kids.. Before the kitchen was remodeled, just making meals and normal stuff was definitely more labor intensive because of her own stature.. The new kitchen I am sure is alot more user friendly for her... Last night Jeremy was complaining about the height of the microwave... In a house like that you can't please everyone... Heck, microwaves are so cheap... why not have 2!

I see Amy coming around this season.. I think she's beginning to enjoy the perks that the show has bought to the family and it should ease the financial problems.. Matt seems to want to spend money on one project or another faster than he can make it... I think it was probably alot more reassuring to have a steady paycheck.. I think he'd be able to have a home office and work for home rather than doing the travel... I thought it was ultimately her decision..and made to ease her stress.. He was just trying to get the farm profitable..

I think Amy entered the whole idea of the TLC project with skepticism.... What mother wouldn't have? To her it was probably another 'dream'... I really gotta respect her for wanting to be who she is...warts and all..(i.e. messiness). You can see the genuine love the family has for one another... She is the disciplinarian of the family... and he gets to play the good guy to the kids the majority of the time.

One episode last season I disagreed with Matt was about the money that Zach mishandled from the farm sales... Matt had it and was waiting for Zach to panic or realize it was missing.. Apparently it came out that everytime Matt found money of Zach's or something he put it away... He said he'd eventually give it back... I just think they should have been in agreement with how it should be handled.. I agree about teaching the kids responsibility...But Matt was a bit gleeful about not letting Zach know what he was doing... I don't remember exactly how it went down.. I know Matt was trying to teach him a lesson but at the same time, I didn't think it was quite fair the particular way he was trying to do it.. I don't think Amy did either..

I think Matt is a dreamer and a romantic... and Amy the practical one.. There in lies the reality that most couples have some form of conflict with their personalities... I think they accept one another for how it is...

I just thought the editing was funny regarding the organization project 'gift'.. Matt looking everywhere but at Amy's reaction to reading it. I think she enjoyed having someone else make the decisions about how the laundry room and pantry would be set up... She got to be the decision maker. Ultimately it's good for the whole family.. As I said I wouldn't mind that type of gift.. I'm a bit practical too..

One thing to mention.. Even when Matt does these projects and dreams... he gets others involved.. Even if it was nice for Matt to send his wife and daughter (who enjoy the same birthday) on a balloon ride and get away together...he was at home trying to redo a bathroom for her.. He tends to be a bit too bossy with the volunteers.. Namely his dad! I can see that even his dad gets annoyed at him!

But I think the Roloff's are enjoying the popularity of their show and the pressure is probably off Amy. I really can understand where she was coming from last season or when the show first started.. I remember her being worried about the bills and here Matt was drawing plans for an addition on the house..!

The chat transcript was interesting.. Matt says he earned great money when he was working.. and how they bought the farm in 1990.. But he also lost alot of money in the stock market.. I can understand how he even became a dreamer... because of his own childhood restrictions due to his legs.. He also made mention of taking comments people make regarding their family into consideration.. Of course, throwing out the negative...and keeping the constructive.. They each see their own faults and are striving to bring balance into their home. Matt mentioned too to someone's question if the show was a good representation of their home and life..and he said it was according to alot of people who knew them. Oh yeah, Zach was part of the chat... It was an interesting read.

He's a smart businessman... I'm sure Amy is thanking and appreciating him... I do see alot of warmth... But keeping up with 4 kids is a crazy life. I can imagine the day to day craziness.

Last night they showed the preschool graduation and it looked like Amy was the spokesman to the families... so I think she was or wound up anyway being the primary teacher..

I hardly ever see her sitting down... so I think she is an incredibly hard worker and devoted mom. I can see why Matt really does genuinely appreciate her too!

Yes, I do think Amy has many good qualities. She is certainly a hard worker and very devoted to her children. I just wish she would cut out some of the negativity when it comes to Matt. On the next program I'm going to count how many times she says anything nice or supportive to Matt.

Matt's father and he do butt heads at times when Matt gets overly bossy, which he does have a tendancy to do. I think he does that because he has so little say so in the house. I also picked up on several times that Amy and Matt's parents seem to clash. Amy did not like it one bit when Matt's mother cleaned her house when she was on vacation. You could tell Matt's mother thought the house was toooo dirty and needed a good cleaning. You know what they say about 2 women in the kitchen....not going to work.

It seems the kids have picked up on Amy's negativity towards Matt and they demonstrate it at times towards him. I know parents aren't perfect but I have a problem with that.

Now, I would have raised cane if my husband wanted to buy a rooster! All that noise early every morning. That was a bad idea IMO. I would have put my foot down over that.

Anyway, I still enjoy the show and hopefully Matt will get to live his dreams and Amy will loosen up a little.<br><br>Post edited by: Debby, at: 2006/10/10 14:10

Well I got the chance to check out 2 of the new shows this weekend. Amy actually was nice to Matt twice! I could hardly believe it. Once she said she would like to have dinner with him and then she helped plant pumpkin seeds and plants on their farm. Of couse she critisized the heck out of him about it first, but, then she changed gear and jumped in to help and encourage the kids to help as well.

It seems that the kid who is the most negative and critical of his father is Zack. He is their small size son who is a twin. He is just like his mother and always talking trash about his dad. Seldom does he have a kind word for him. That may be because I think his father has very high expectations of him and rides on him alot.

I was so impressed when their daughter Molly agreed to plant pumpkin seeds along with her girlfriends for money. She negoiated a fair price for the service even though her mom was encouraging her to overcharge by far. Molly held her own and kept stating that the price she was quoting was fair.

The Hawaii vacation looks like it's going to be fun. I can't wait to see Matt come down that zip line. Despite his physical obstacles, he will not be held back. I would really love to meet this family, especially Matt. He inspires me. Too late to plant pumpkins, but, I am definitely going to check out a pumpkin patch.

Oh I'm sooooooo jealous of the Hawaiian vacation.........and full-out luxury too!!! Nope............hubby and I won't get one of those until both kids are thru college!!!

I really like the show and I get a sense of each of them with all their strengths and weaknesses. I'm really torn with both Matt and Amy...........I can so totally see both sides and both viewpoints. I think with the long track record of their marriage they do have a strong bond.

Watching them enjoy the helicopter ride was a blast!!!! Although I'm not getting up on one of those things!!

I really do agree with you about Matt and Amy... They probably are well suited to each other... because of their personality differences.. They can help balance one another..

As for Zach being hard on his dad... and sometimes Jeremy being obstinate with his mom... I mostly see it as normal teenage rebellion. I think Matt expects too much out of Zach...and is forgetting that he's only 16.. Case in point is the little people's conventions... and he's always pushing Zach to meeting girls.. I've seen Amy and Jeremy going at it this past season..(jeremy does it in a quiet way) about school things.. being responsible about stuff and I recall the time Jeremy didn't want to go to soccer practices.. I agreed with Amy that once you commit to a team, they are counting on you... and you need to be a team player..not just a 'if you feel like it that day' team player. (my words and general idea she was trying to convey to him)..

I get the feeling that these are normal teen issues with both the older boys. Heck, I can frustrate the heck out of my kids at times... They say I nag... I tell them it's my job...

I haven't seen Molly stir up any ruckus... She seems to be well grounded or perhaps just people pleaser.. Maybe she's still too young. Not sure how old she is at this point.. I'd guess 13 or so... I am sure her time is coming to have the teen conflict stuff with her parents.

All in all, I still think this family has tremendous heart with good intentions and alot of love for one another..

I hope they hadn't overdone a good thing by trying to do a second season.. I would think it would be alot of pressure to have those cameras on and around you so much...

Many of the reality stars say that when you are around the cameras so much, you eventually get so accustomed to it that you forget and it's like they aren't even there anymore.

I sometimes wonder how they deal with things like, gas. What if you ate too many chili beans and it starts to show. I would think that would be kind of embarrassing. LOL.

I read on the their website that Matt watched last season's shows and then actually saw how he was too forceful with Zach about meeting girls. He said it made him feel bad and he has pulled back and is not doing that anymore. He didn't realize how bad he was until he saw it on the screen.

I would hope that Amy takes a look at herself and gives Matt a break with her nagging. I just wish he would set her straight sometimes instead of just grinning and taking it. Maybe that's what she is pushing for.

I know that the post here have indicated that the couple is well suited, and they may be to a certain point, however, I think it sets a bad example for the children to have one parent that is so openly critical of the other parent in their presence. If you must do it, do it in private.

I think a nice touch to this season would be Matt and Amy going to marriage counseling.