Starting Over Talk - Peer Coaching Support Site

Sorrry if you are going through some rough times.

In all honesty though, it's not uncommon. Young people often want their cake and eat it too. You want help but you don't want people telling you how to run your life.. (actually they are probably telling you what things you should do or not do, in order for you to turn your life around.)

You need to find a counselor that you trust and you'll have to trust that they have your best interest at heart. More than likely they are trying to give you some feedback on things you can be doing to change the direction your life is spinning. Sometimes it's how things are said.. Find a counselor you like.. Sometimes their life experiences and training really can be of great benefit to you. They are not trying to annoy you or add to your problems. How has your way of doing things gotten you so far? If you really want to change direction you need someone to help you do that.. If you reject what they say because you think they are telling you what to do then you are sabotaging your own progress.

You do need to think for yourself.. but just relearn ways to cope with situations. A good counselor will help you do that.

I think if you have a little faith in the process that you will do great!

Hang in there. It takes time to change your thought processes... (how you perceive things)

I think it is pretty common for young people to feel alot of the same things you are feeling.. All of my children have gone through their phases of thinking I don't know anything..or that I have no right giving them advice or worse, telling them what to do... It's a process of separation and growing up. They naturally wanted to exert and practice their independence... Fortunately they never got into real trouble.. Now that they are in their early 20's (2 of them) they now appreciate very much, how we parented them. We tried to protect and guide them.. and instill some fundamental values.
Now they see the bigger picture and can make decisions better. Fortunately they lost the 'tude'..

I've told more than one friend over the years.. That I wouldn't want to go through my teen years again for anything. It really can be a difficult time.. Emotionally, physically and mentally... But time really does help.. Please just hang in there.. Trust somebody who knows what they are doing..

I envy you being able to watch the Starting Over reruns. That show may make an impression on you and ultimately help you. Sometimes when you are on the outside looking in.. you see the issues a little more clearly and you can learn from other peoples struggles. I always could identify with most of the houseguests in one way or another.