Starting Over Talk - Peer Coaching Support Site

I'm so sorry to hear about your mom's friend... she will be in my thoughts and prayers.

What gets me angry... and I'm no doctor... just a woman with common sense... is why the heck didn't they give your mom's friend an ultrasound? It's all about the money. Several years ago I got a Mam that showed something unusual... doctor said to wait and see... come back in six months. I was lucky the "something unusual" did not grow or change... the doctor told me to get another Mam 12 months later. Mam was "normal" for several years, however, my new doctor saw "something unusual," and sent me for an ultrasound... then to an oncologist. To make a long story short... the "something unusual" was aspirated and turned out to be nothing. As a precaution in addition to my usual Mam a year later the doctor wanted me to take an ultrasound. I thought that would be a usual thing for me, however, the doctor informed me that she was unable to justify the additional expense of another ultrasound to the "insurance company." "Oh" was my answer... today I'm angry that doctor's are more concerned about the "insurance company" than the patient's peace of mind... today I'm angry that there still is no cure for cancer. Sorry for venting, but my first thought was... I'm not surprised syour mom's friend got into an accident with the thought of cancer hanging over her head. Today so many women get cancer that it seems to be more the norm than the exception... cancer is a very sore subject with me these days... I find myself questioning doctors more than ever before... you go to several doctors... you get several different answers... Frustration.

Post edited by: mazzy, at: 2006/10/21 07:02<br><br>Post edited by: mazzy, at: 2006/10/21 07:21

Debby................most definitely she and her family and you are in my thoughts and prayers. Sending a special hug to you too!!

mazzy................we'll just keep hoping and praying that your sis will have a long remission. It is hard to change lifelong eating habits.....our family is struggling with that too to hopefully prevent some of these issues.


Yes, my friend and I were talking about insurance and doctors yet again. The goods, bads and uglies. When oh WHEN will this country ever practice preventative medicine!!!!!!!!!!!

Thanks Mazz and Grizz for your thoughts and prayers. I think it is helping. My mother's friend is still in ICU and was on life support but they tell us she is breathing some on her own, whatever that means. I didn't think you could breath on your own when you are on a ventilator, but I'm not sure.

The family was at the hospital all weekend and have not been allowed to speak with their mother's doctor! I thought it was the most bizarre thing I have ever heard of. I hope they can speak to her doctor today. Duke Med Center was too full for her so they flew her to University of NC at Chapel Hill Med Center. It is also known as a great hospital. I hope they can help her not only with the injuries but the cancer. She was actually planning on getting her cancer treatment at the small local hospital. I think UNC has an entire department that specializes in women's cancer.

We are all just praying she recovers so she can start treatment for her cancer.

I don't know if they actually did an untrasound on her after we protested just waiting. I hope so. If they didn't, I'm referring her to a medical malpractice attorney.

I'll keep you apprised.

I spoke with my mother's best friend's son last night. The family was able to speak with the doctors yesterday thank goodness. SHe has 4 different teams working on various injuries. She is too weak to undergo surgery right now, but that will occur when she is stronger. She will require surgery on her fractures. They have the ventilator turned to its lowest rating because she is doing much of the breathing for herself, which is good and they hope to get her off the ventilator today and into a private room. This will be great if it happens.

Of course the family is still very concerned about her. Each day there is a delay in treating the cancer, the harder the fight will be, but she is too weak for any kind of surgery or treatment right now. It's a sad situation.

THis is a good woman who raised 5 chidren, with a dominating husband, who did get better in their later years. He is now deceased. She also worked full time throughout her life. She is a good Christian who supports her church, helps with the poor and needy and is always there for her family, kids, grandkids, etc. I have never heard her say one bad word about anyone, even when her husband verbally abused her. Why must she go through this horrible experience. I guess I'm just confused at the fairness of this happening to her.
Thanks for your thoughts and prayers.

I hear what you are saying... I remember when my sister was first diagnosed with cancer... she kept saying why... why... why...

There is no answer... it's part of life.

This site helped me get through very dark days... the prayers... and the kind words of people were very healing.

So Debby... stay strong... your mom's friend is lucky she has people like you in her life. Take care... you and your mom's friend are in my thoughts.

Mazzy

Debby,

I'm so sorry........I lost someone so incredibly special to me who was so wonderful...........yet people who are truly nasty and selfish seem to flourish! It is indeed so hard to bear at times!

Just keep her in your prayers........I will too. And remember that all the good and wonderful things she's done in her years will honestly leave this world such a better place!!! And she'll be rewarded....I have to believe that somehow!!!

But it doesn't make it any easier to deal with at all. Just know that you are not alone and can definitely come here for support and big ole hugs!!!!!