Starting Over Talk - Peer Coaching Support Site

As we now know Antonia just does not want to hear it. I can't blame her. She just does not want anything to do with him. I am sure she has thought about this more then once and over time this is the decision she made. I think she doesn't appreciate the issue being shoved down her throat. Jennifer's relationship with her father is a bit different and what worked for her will not work for Antonia. In time Antonia may change her mind, but for now they need to let it go and let her focus on her problem that brought her to the SOH.

It seems that I've heard references to a step dad too. Iyanla implied that Antonia's loyalty to her mom was an issue (much as it was with Jodi during her resistance and the dad factor)...

We don't know when the last time Antonia even saw her dad. Maybe he was a child abuser or wife beater. We will never know..
If Antonia doesn't have any direct memories of her dad, the memories she does have were planted there by her mom.

I don't know why Iyanla is pushing the issue in this case. Maybe Iyanla suspects that some of her out of control behavior is rooted in her anger toward her dad. Or maybe the same type of behavior she engages in is what ultimately led her dad down the wrong path.. Then being open to what is going on with her dad might be relevant.

She may also consider her stepfather her father... in every sense of the word. Maybe she wants to withhold that honor from her real father. Also she may very well feel loyalty toward her stepfather too.

Even if she doesn't want to now, she may want to be open to the possibilities some time later... as she gains some maturity.

I don't know how Antonia can possibly justify her rudeness to Jennifer. Also, she continues to be rude to Iylana. I wish Iylana or Dr. Stan would address this.

I agree with the rest of you that Antonia shouldn't be pushed into a relationship that she doesn't want or simply isn't ready for, whichever the case may be they should respect her wishes on it.

However, it wasn't Jennifer's fault and Antonia had no right taking it out on her.. she totally dismissed her from the start. She was rude throughout and didn't even bother thanking her and politely excusing herself before she left. Instead she got up and it was done. Jennifer was asked to speak with her, it was FOR Antonia not Jennifer. For her to have treated her that way was totally wrong. Who does she think she is? This little 'it's all about Antonia' mindset of hers has got to stop. There was no reason whatsoever to treat Jennifer the way she did. It wouldn't have killed her to politely listen and thank her for her time and then go. Assignment completed without a hitch. That is the type close-mindedness I just cannot tolerate. She may not like what Jennifer had to say.. but if she were open-minded she would listen and actually hear what she was trying to tell her then make the ultimate decision for herself. She wanted no part of it, period. She wasted Jennifer's time and if she doesn't come down off her high horse she will be wasting SO's time and ours as well. Enough is enough Antonia. You can be so fun and witty and then your dark side comes through and it makes you look just awful. I hope you get the chance to really look at yourself and how you treat others.

I think there is another thread in Antonia's forum about the meeting with Jennifer.

I started this one...based on previews as spoiler info.
Now that it has come to pass, maybe the other area would be better for dialogue.

so where is it?-- the link