Starting Over Talk - Peer Coaching Support Site

I questioned the wisdom of keeping alcohol in the house when some of the hg's are very early in their recovery. To say that they do have to confront it eventually is absolutely true. We live in a world where alcohol exists and lots of people enjoy it. But to blithely assume the addicts will come back from even one relapse is dead wrong. They don't, always, and there a lot of headstones to prove it. It's kind of another version of "just get over it". Not everyone can, not everyone will, no matter what makes sense from the outside looking in. Playing around with it is risky behavior, for them.

But, hey. If they do keep alcohol in the house? We're supposed to be surprised if somebody actually gets bombed eventually?

I dunno whether it's gonna turn out Kim's got a problem, or Christie's just got a problem with Kim not having a problem. Jealousy and fear are some of her favorite themes, iirc. That was my first thought, anyway.

I think with Allison, rightly or wrongly, they figured she had bigger or more immediate fish to fry in dealing with her cancer situation and need for additional surgeries. But it is clear there were alcohol issues there.

As I said, I too am surprised there is alcohol in the house with so many women having substance issues. And even with those who don't, how helpful is it to have a numbing agent around for "social" purposes when one is trying to feel and address buried or difficult feelings? I do think there is a belief that they want the women to face real world temptations while in the house - again, whether they are right or wrong about that.

Rhonda herself has been sober for years and knows the issue - could it be that she has forgotten what it's like to be surrounded by others who drink socially when one is in early recovery? I would be very interested in her take on this issue.

Oh, I said this on a different thread earlier today but it seems to fit here.

No, of course not all people with problems self-medicate. TJ was a good example of that. But some do seem to do that - Allison, Lisa 1 (IMO), Karen, possibly Kim and, given Kim's family history, alcohol could become an issue for her even if it isn't yet. I too have questioned why, in a house with people who have recovery issues, like Christie, Cassie and various others, there would be booze in the house. I can only assume it is a philosophy that in the real world, there will be temptation as well, so the ladies need to learn to handle it and not to blame their environment if they over-indulge. A rough analogy would be those women who want to lose weight and face the presence of junk food in the House. Also, the presence of alcohol in the house may actually assist LCs in diagnosing an alcohol problem that a houseguest may not even be aware she has. (Kim, maybe?)

Still, while some of the women are in the early stages of working through substance abuse issues, it seems odd that alcohol would be so readily available there. Maybe it's a matter of trusting the women to police themselves if they do have a substance abuse issue rather than creating an artifically sanitized environment for them ...?

Mmmm...couldn't say for sure. I know I sure can self-medicate, and I wouldn't have trusted me around the stuff early on. But that was me. I have wine in the house now. It's been here for years because I just plain forget about it. Probably vinegar, actually. If the ladies in the house want to do it their own way? Whatever. Might as well serve the stuff up in the AA clubs, since it's always gonna be there.

OTOH - sometimes I think, after a whole week with the lovley lasses of the SOH, a good stiff drink could look pretty darned inviting!

Mmmm...couldn't say for sure. I know I sure can self-medicate, and I wouldn't have trusted me around the stuff early on. But that was me. I have wine in the house now. It's been here for years because I just plain forget about it. Probably vinegar, actually. If the ladies in the house want to do it their own way? Whatever. Might as well serve the stuff up in the AA clubs, since it's always gonna be there.

OTOH - sometimes I think, after a whole week with the lovley lasses of the SOH, a good stiff drink could look pretty darned inviting!

QUOTE:
Might as well serve the stuff up in the AA clubs, since it's always gonna be there

This joke is like a martini - very dry.