|
Thursday January 26, 2006
The show opens and Jodi says that she feels comfortable in the house and things are better after group this morning which was difficult. She says that meeting the housemates was great, and that only time will tell. Lisa is telling Jodi how her parents sold their house and bought her a condo and then furnished it with all of her parents’ old stuff. Lisa says that it was all just given to her and that she didn’t have to pay for any of it, and that’s not what adults do. Jodi tells Lisa that adults take free stuff and there is nothing wrong with what she did. Lisa says yeah. Jodi tells Lisa she looks worn out, and Lisa tells Jodi that she had to wear her crutches to someone’s graduation last night and that it was humbling for her, and she doesn’t do humbling well. In confessional, Lisa says that she has to wear these crutches as a reminder of the things that are keeping her from being independent, and she says her two biggest crutches are her parents and Mr. Internet.
In confessional, Lisa A says that all of the housemates have a card with instructions on them for her to. Lisa calls for Lisa A and tells her that they are going on a trip. LA says that she is not ready to go public with this embarrassment, but here we go, and we will see what today is going to bring. Lisa, Lisa A, and Jill all leave in the car.
Rhonda comes to the door and brings Christie a bag and asks her to change into the clothes and meet her in the study, Christie just looks in the bag, and Rhonda asks her what is wrong, and then points to the study where they are going to meet. Christie says let me see them first, and Rhonda tells her she doesn’t get a choice. Christie reluctantly goes and puts on the outfit Rhonda brought. In confessional, Christie says that after having gastric bypass and losing 100 lbs that she has been left with extra skin, stretch marks, and scars and she doesn’t feel comfortable having to wear this outfit, and it is very embarrassing and humiliating for her.
Lisa, Jill, and Lisa A arrive to their destinations. In confessional, Jill says that Iyanla has given her the assignment to take Lisa A out and give her tasks that will make her realize what happens when you let other people run your life. First, Jill and Lisa have Lisa A skip across the street and back. Lisa A says that just one way would be enough and that her knees hurt. They tell her that she can curtsey her way across the street and LA tells them she would rather skip. Lisa and Jill then tell her that she has to skip and flap her arms like a bird flying. Lisa A hits her arms together implying that she is giving Lisa and Jill “the bird”. Lisa A does skip across the street and back. Lisa A says that her humiliation is as high as it can go and that she wants to run away. LA says that back home she doesn’t even walk to the mail box, and she is way out of her comfort zone. Jill and Lisa tell LA that she looked so cute skipping. Jill then approaches a young black couple and tells LA that she is going to ask the woman to teach her how to booty shake. In confessional, LA says that she doesn’t even know how and she doesn’t think she can do this. LA approaches the woman and asks her to teach her how to booty shake, and the girl asks if LA is going to do it after her, and Jill says yes. The girl does a cute little booty shake and LA tries to do it, but it looks awkward and you can tell she doesn’t want to do it. In confessional, Jill says that LA needs this because if you give total control over your life over to other people they can do whatever they want with it.
In confessional, Rhonda says that Christie has lost a considerable amount of weight, but she wants to see if Christie has lost all her problems. Rhonda asks Christie what it means to wear short sleeves and shorts and Christie says that it is embarrassing because she is ugly and that people are judging her. Rhonda asks Christie what she was hoping to get out of having gastric bypass and Christie says to not feel fat, ugly, and disgusting. Rhonda tells her they are going to do an assignment that will flush out all of her problems and then asks Christie if she is willing to do that, and Christie says she is willing to do whatever Rhonda wants her to do. In confessional, Christie says that she will do whatever it takes even if she has to be humiliated and torn down to get it, she is willing. Rhonda then starts wrapping Christie in cotton batting and ace bandages and she is telling Christie that they are going to identify all the issues she had before gastric bypass. In confessional, Rhonda says that she is wrapping Christie up to show her all the wounds that she had, and that even though she has had gastric bypass surgery, the wounds are still the same. Christie says she is angry with her mom for not loving her and having to use food to fill the void. Christie says that if her mother had given her the love she wanted and needed that she wouldn’t have had to fill herself up with food. Christie says that she feels that her dad is selfish too. Rhonda asks Christie why her dad was selfish, and Christie says that there was talk of him killing himself. Rhonda tells Christie that she is alone, blames her mom, feels abandoned, betrayed, and angry. Rhonda asks her what other issues she had. Christie says that she was a brat, bitchy, needy, and that she felt the world owed her something. In confessional, Christie says that as Rhonda is wrapping her up she feels heavy again, and she feels embarrassed and big and fat again. Rhonda asks Christie what she wanted her gastric bypass to solve. Christie says that she wanted to feel beautiful because if she felt beautiful she wouldn’t feel any of those things. Rhonda asks if it helped. Christie says for a little while, and then says that she doesn’t know. In confessional, Christie says that having the surgery she thought that her whole life was going to change, and that it did for a moment, but it all went back. Rhonda tells Christie that she wants to wear her bandages for the rest of the day and that she would see her later.
In confessional, Kim says that she is doing laundry and that she is excited that her husband and son are coming tomorrow and that she just wants to focus on them the whole time they are at the house and not have to worry about anything else.
They then take her up on a balcony and have LA yell that she is the queen of the world. In confessional, Jill says that Lisa A has lost her voice and she is going to show this to her by making her scream at the top of her lungs. Jill has Lisa A go up to the balcony to scream. In confessional, LA asks how she can scream that she is queen of the world because she doesn’t feel like it. She says she feels like queen of total embarrassment. She does it half heartedly, and Jill tells her that she has to yell it, and Jill gets up there and does it first. LA then does it, and then Jill tells her to do it again with the booty shake, and LA does it very well.
Jodi and Christie are in the kitchen. Christie is having a sandwich and says that she feels like she shouldn’t be eating. Jodi asks her why and then tells her that what she is eating is healthy. Christie says she doesn’t feel like she deserves to eat. Jodi asks why and Christie tells Jodi about her gastric bypass and weight loss. Jodi says that you have to be willing to tell your story and that she learned that today. Christie says that it’s hard because you want to protect people. Jodi says that she is not going to continuously go there, because she is in the house because of her stuff and not her parents’ stuff. In confessional, Jodi says that talking about her family and situations that happened when she was a child is difficult because she wants to protect her family. She says that she is there and they are not and it’s going to be difficult.
Jill, Lisa, and LA get home and meet Christie right away. Lisa on her crutches says that someone has it worse than her apparently and says do tell, unless you don’t want to. Christie tells them that she thought all these things would be fixed by having gastric bypass, and they weren’t. Christie says that until she deals with the stuff on the inside it won’t matter on the outside. Lisa asks if Christie’s surgery made her feel any different even though she looks so pretty. Christie says for a minute. Lisa then says it’s like when someone buys you something and you want something else.
In confessional, Kim says that she doesn’t want people taking her laundry and putting it in the dryer no matter how good their intentions are. Kim goes to Lisa A and asks her if she knows about the sheets in the laundry and Lisa A says that she doesn’t know and hasn’t been in there.
Lisa is calling Rhonda and gets her voicemail. Lisa says that Rhonda is a psychic genius who knows Lisa better than she knows herself. She says she is calling to let her know that the longer she spends with this exercise it keeps changing. Lisa says she has been lying to herself and using everything outside herself to avoid herself. Lisa goes into the fake cry voice and says she can’t do it anymore. In confessional, Lisa says that she knows that she needs to break up with Mr. Internet once and for all.
Jill is outside with Jodi. Jill tells Jodi that she reminds her a lot of herself. Jodi says that she is lucky to have her as a roommate because she can learn from Jill’s experience if she will share. Jill says oh, yes. Jill says that Jodi is like she was right before she came to the house. Jill says that if things weren’t going her way that she didn’t want to hear it. Jodi says that she didn’t feel like she was like that, and Jill tells her that is how she came off. Jodi says that she doesn’t feel like she has a problem taking criticism or constructive criticism, but once she knows you. Jill says yes, but on my terms. Jodi says that she guesses that it true. Jodi then asks Jill if she was resistant when she first came in the house and Jill says completely and totally. Jodi then asks Jill if they came down hard on her in the meeting where she told her story. Jill says they came down harder, and that Iyanla told Jill that she was a liar. Jill says that Iyanla ate her for lunch.
Lisa is at the computer crying. In confessional, Lisa says that Internet Man had to go, and so she sent him an email that said that she didn’t want to see him anymore and to please not contact her ever again. Lisa says that he could never give her what she wants. Never, and she would kill herself trying. Lisa is on the phone with her mother. Lisa’s mother tells her that she sounds down. Lisa says that she thought she was doing better than she was and tells her mother about her crutches. Lisa’s mother tells her that if she had had that fling that she would be looking at things differently because it obviously is at the front of her mind. Lisa tells her mom that was the first thing she let go of. Her mother sounded shocked and asked really? Lisa says yeah, mom. In confessional, Lisa says that she thinks her mother is really shocked about Internet Man because her mother thought that she would end up with him, and then she wouldn’t have to worry about Lisa anymore and that she doesn’t think that she can do things for herself. Lisa tells her mom that she sent an email telling him not to contact her. Her mom asks her what changed. Lisa says that she doesn’t want someone who doesn’t want her. Lisa tells her mother that he doesn’t want a commitment. Lisa then tells her mom that she has been losing out on cutting corners and having people do things for her, and she realizes how that had only hurt her. Lisa’s mother tells her that to stay in the house and to have to live in realizations all the time, she must really want to change. Lisa’s mom then tells Lisa that she thought Lisa would run screaming from the house, and that she didn’t think Lisa would make it. In confessional, Lisa says that her mom didn’t think that she wouldn’t make it in the house, and that she wouldn’t give up Internet Man, but know her mom knows that she means business.
Kim is writing a note to the rest of the housemates to put in the laundry room. In confessional, Kim says that she wants to make sure that whoever does laundry next that they don’t put her laundry in the dryer because there are some of her clothes that she doesn’t want put in the dryer. She says that the note is the safest way for her because she is in a house with 5 other women and she seriously doesn’t want her stuff put In the dryer.
Lisa is fake crying and tells Lisa A to get the box of her dresser, and after she gets dressed, she wants Lisa A to throw the box away for her. In confessional, Lisa says that the last picture she has of Internet Man is in the box and she has to throw it away to be over and done with him. Lisa goes to bed and is crying and choking. She says she can’t have it near her or any reminders anymore. In confessional, Lisa A says that as she is walking in the kitchen she knows that this is not going to come back to Lisa and that it was special to her. Lisa A says that she is having a very hard time doing this for Lisa. Lisa A is crying, fanning herself with a paper plate, and lying on her bed.
Rhonda and Christie meet again and Rhonda asks Christie if she has any thoughts about her bandages. Christie says that no matter what she does, she will find something else until she heals these wounds. In confessional, Rhonda says that Christie had a horrific childhood with a drug addicted mother and a father who died when she was young. She says that Christie was passed around to many houses and has had to fend for herself. Christie has learned to rely on her addictions. Rhonda asks Christie to tell her about her addictions. Christie says gastric bypass, surgery, alcohol, and at one point prescription pain killers. Rhonda tells Christie that she picked up a great social addiction that she needs to survive, and that’s eating. Christie says that it wasn’t as bad as falling down drunk. Rhonda tells Christie that with gastric bypass, if she doesn’t take care of herself, she could die. Rhonda tells Christie to wear her bandages until the end of the day and then talk to Jill about weight issues because they are similar. Rhonda says that they are going to do deal with everything between her and her loving herself. Christie says deal, and they shake on it.
In the living room Lisa and Jodi are listening to Kim. Kim says no one was around and she had a situation where someone’s stuff was in the washing machine and she wanted to use it. Lisa asks Km if she can offer her something. Lisa says that if it is sheets, towels, or bath mats, to just throw them in the dryer. Otherwise, put things in a basket to the side. In confessional, Lisa says she wants to cut to the chase. She says to put all the normal stuff in the dryer and anything else leave to the side. She says she doesn’t understand all this chat, chat, chat about laundry. Kim says that once they get all their new housemates then they will know what everyone wants. In confessional, Jodi says that the tension in the house is not obvious at first. She says people are trying to tell her what is going on in their own way. She says it feels like they want her to be on their side, and she is the new person. She wants to fit in, but she doesn’t want to lose herself, so she is just trying to figure out how to do that.
Lisa A tells Lisa that it was hard for her to throw away that box. Lisa says that it was her playing Life Coach because she couldn’t be near it anymore. Lisa A is making Lisa’s bed, and Lisa says that she took Internet Man’s email out of her address book, but she doesn’t know how to block. She says the email will go to her junk folder and she just deletes that anyway. Lisa A finishes making Lisa’s bed, and she says that she doesn’t know how to tell Lisa A this, but she is going to have to do this sh** again, because it is not good enough. Lisa tears all the pillows and blankets off the bed and has Lisa A make it again. And she does!! In confessional, Iyanla says that no matter how far Lisa A is pushed, she will not stand up for herself. She says that Lisa A probably has a very high investment in victim hood, and more than she probably knows. Lisa tells Lisa A that she see she knows how to make hospital corners. Lisa A says that she is a master bed maker and finishes making the bed. Lisa says that she is going to take a nap, and that Lisa A is going to have to remake the bed after Lisa gets up from her nap. Lisa A tells Lisa that she is not going to be at her beck and call. In confessional, Lisa says that she fells bad torturing little Lisa, and that in some sick way it is helping her too, but it is making Lisa A very angry. In confessional, Lisa A says that at this point she is feeling the anger and embarrassment. She says that being codependent is no good for her and she has to get out of that shell. In confessional, Christie says that she thinks Lisa A is getting it, but the point is to not let other people make decisions for you. Christie tells Lisa A to blow dry her hair, put on make-up, and then put on her shoes. In confessional, Christie says that she thinks that Lisa A is getting angry having to take 4 showers today and change her clothes over and over, but once she has time to process it, it will make more sense to her.
Christie says she is approaching Jill about her weight issues. She says that weight is an issue for both of them and she wants to be delicate. Christie says that gastric bypass wasn’t a quick fix. It was her last option, but it doesn’t change the way she feels inside. Jill says that she always knew her role as the fat girl, and Christie agrees with Jill with the pretty face. Then they both say you have such a pretty face, if you could just lose weight. (I know I have heard this one too many times in my life.) Christie says that if she lost weight and became beautiful that everything would go away, and it didn’t. Christie asks Jill if she got that. Jill says that she thought it was going to be a lightning bolt and that she would change like that, but it didn’t happen like that. Jill says that she was able to realize that she is a woman with weight to release and a lot of baggage, but she is not fat. That is not who she is. Christie says that her weight loss was a band-aid for a second, but she still has a distorted image, but she likes what Jill said and that it doesn’t define her. In confessional, Christie says that she is going to start at the beginning and learn how to erase the words and start replacing them with new images and emotions. Christie takes off her bandages.
Lisa A gets a phone call from her son. She tells her son she is having a rough day, and that she had an intense lesson that was very good, but very hard. She tells him that she depends on others to do things for her, and she can’t do that anymore. He tells her that no one said this was going to be easy. In confessional, Lisa A says that it has opened her eyes to see how she can’t do anything on her own, even being on the street talking to strangers. Lisa A tells her son that she has made up her mind that this is what she wants. Her son tells her that she has been looking down a dark, dark tunnel for a long time, and now she is finally seeing a light at the end of the tunnel. In confessional, Lisa A says that she has been in her comfort zone for too many years. She says that it is okay to be different and to speak up.
Lisa says to send an email that says she doesn’t want to see Mr. Internet anymore was tough, and that she thought it would be easy, but it wasn’t. Christie asks if it was brief and Lisa says yes. Lisa says that it said that she doesn’t want to see him and to not contact her. Lisa says there was no need to go into an explanation because he doesn’t care. Lisa says that he will probably look at the email and laugh. Lisa says that he was up front and told her that he wanted her for dinner and sex. Lisa says that she can make it all pretty by saying that he flew her to New York and she was staying in a beautiful hotel suite, but he was kicking her out in the morning like a hooker, but she wasn’t getting paid. Lisa says she wasn’t being treated like a hooker or a girlfriend and Lisa says that she would never be in a relationship like that. Christie tells Lisa that she doesn’t even seem like she would put up with that. Lisa says she wouldn’t now in a million years, but before she would have done anything for him.
In confessional, Lisa says that she receives a response from Mr. Internet and it is not a surprise that the relationship meant a whole lot less to him than it did to her. Lisa reads the letter to Jill: “I have advised you for over a year to move on. Have fun and don’t think about me. I hope you are having a good one” Lisa says that she likes the “many kisses”. In confessional, Jill says that Lisa’s lack of emotion and depth of understand of what is going on here is really troublesome. Jill tells Lisa to trust her when she says there will be another one. Lisa says that she isn’t even emotional about it, and Jill tells Lisa that is what is bothering her. Lisa says that she doesn’t have an impulse if that is what she is thinking. In confessional, Jill says that Lisa is telling her that she no longer has an impulse to email Internet Man. She says she is looking at Lisa thinking to herself that Lisa is a LIAR. Jill says to Lisa that she hopes she knows that if she emails him again that she is a masochist.
All the women go out by the fireplace outside. In confessional, Lisa A says that she feels comfortable with all of the women tonight. She says she thinks that Lisa could relate to each other struggling with assignments. They are roasting marshmallows and Jill says that she wanted to say that she put it in the universe that she wanted a roommate who was a willing spirit ready to change her life. In confessional, Kim says that Jill is like “We love Jodi” and oh, yeah intimacy. Jill says that intimacy is always painful. She says that you have to be vulnerable to be intimate. Kim asks Jill if she thinks she will better at intimacy once she leaves the house, and Jill says that she wasn’t intimate before she came to the house, and she doesn’t know. In confessional, Kim says that the tension with her and Jill is to where she is noticing it, and that Jill just doesn’t want to be intimate with her. Jill says that she thinks that she has figured it out in here. Jodi asks Jill what her definition of intimacy is, and Jill says a willingness to have a difficult conversation with anybody. Jill says to think of all the friendships you have where you love each other to death, but you don’t have the difficult conversations with them because you don’t want to hurt each other. Jill says once you get past that you can say anything. Jodi says that she has two friends like that. Jill says that she has three, and then says six, and then counts out three more saying nine. In confessional, Kim says that Jill says she has six people, and then 7, 8, and 9 not including Kim. Kim says that’s fine because she will have plenty of opportunity with the other women as soon as Jill leaves, which hopefully is soon.
Kim’s husband calls and he tells her he is trying to get everything wrapped up and get to LA. Kim says she can’t believe that he is coming tomorrow and that she is so excited. He tells her they need to talk about that. She asks him when he wants to hook up, and he says he doesn’t know because he has to get everything and he will also be gone next week with Jax. In confessional, Kim says that she doesn’t feel any love and compassion in the house right now, so she is going to soak up as much as she can from her husband and Jax while they are there.
Jill tells Lisa to promise her. Lisa tells Jill that she has no temptation. Jill says that if they were 14 she would make Lisa cut her finger and write it in blood. Jill tells Lisa to never say never because she had this notion that she would walk away from what she was and never be that way again, and that’s not reality. Lisa says thanks for giving me your reality check. In confessional, Jill says sure, everything is fine and dandy right now, but she knows Lisa and she knows Rhonda. Jill says she knows that if Lisa contacts Mr. Internet again, it is enough to get Lisa put out of the house. Jill then says “Flight 433 to Miami now boarding.”
Next on Starting Over: Lisa breaks the rules again. Lisa answers the door without her crutches. In confessional, Rhonda says Lisa is supposed to be walking with the crutches and that she is surprised Lisa is answering the door without them. Kim’s marriage comes under fire. Rhonda tells Kim’s husband that she can give Kim every assignment in the book, but until she is willing to do it, there is nothing that can be done. Christie confronts her past head on. All the women are crying and Christie says that she is so angry and disappointed. She says it cost her childhood and everything.
|
Home 
