Starting Over Talk - Peer Coaching Support Site

Okay....so here is TVgals spoiler for Friday....I've sent her a PM...and don't feel I can do anymore unti I have her permission...but this should satisfy those with spoiler appetites...and for some folks these might serve as recaps as well...not to dis the ladies already doing the recap, because it's good to have several storyteller's perspectives....enjoy..............

-New post-
Friday 9/23

It is the next morning and Lou is feeling out of sorts from all the emotion. Jaclyn goes and crawls into bed with Michael to snuggle. (a sweet moment). Simon comes looking for Kacie and he is sitting in a chair in her room eating some kind of breakfast bar and she is telling him that she really wants to see him show emotion and that she could be sitting there crying her eyes out and he would show no emotion and that the only time she knows he is feeling anything is when he isolates himself. Simon’s response was, “you really need to work on brevity (sp?). If I didn’t stop you, you would just go on and on.” (Iyanla sure has her work cut out for her. Hello? Simon? Tune in. He really reacts like all he heard was “blah blah blah”. I guess Kacie needs to learn to communicate in shorter sentences like, “just cry dangit!”) Needless to say Kacie gets up and leaves.

Cheryl and Troy are to stay at the house and the other couples are sent on a hike. We see Cheryl and Troy eating Cheerio’s together and not saying a word. Cheryl in confessional says she has no idea where Troy’s head is in this process.

The others are in a park and are playing the question game again. Lou asks the question, “If your in-laws needed a place to stay would you let them move in with you. Lou says his first instinct is no just because he feels he is in tight quarters at home anyway. Jaclyn says yes and Michael adds that he would but he knows his step-mom gets frisky a lot and he didn’t know if he could handle that. No comment from Simon or Kacie.

Next question is “what would you do if one of your children told you that they were homosexual? Michael says that his brother is gay and he supports him no matter what. Simon says that he has a gay sister. He says that he was blown away when she told him. He was 18 at the time. He says that he doesn’t care that she is gay but there is always drama. Kacie adds that she has never seen a happy gay relationship.
Lou says that being a hairdresser he knows a lot of “fruitcakes” and he likes all of them. He says it may sound weird but he has fun flirting with them. Then he adds that he would hope if his daughter were to say she were gay, that she would be just sorta gay, not really really gay. Simon in confessional laughing about Lou and saying he does light up a room. (I will be interested to see what your take is on this. I think it was offered in a lighthearted manor with a touch of ignorance mixed in, but not meant to be mean spirited)

Everyone is together outside and Rhonda and Iyanla show up. Michael volunteers to go first in the unknown activity. Iyanla holds up two cards and they each take one. One is blank and the other says blindfold. So Jaclyn puts on a life vest, blindfold and helmet and Michael takes her hand and they follow Iyanla out. Then Rhonda has the others put on the gear. Simon walks over to Kacie who is now giving him the cold shoulder.

The activity is that the husbands take turns leading their wives blindfolded down to the pool and they have built a bridge of plywood over it and partway through there is a box to either step over or climb over. Michael and Jaclyn do great. Then Lou leads Jennifer down. She if very afraid. Turns out her first husband told her one time that he wanted to show her some flower down by the pool and when they got there he shoved her in. So this exercise is really hard for her. Part way across she freezes and Lou tells her that he loves her so much that he will make sure she gets over safely. When she gets there she is crying. In confessional she says this was not only about communication but trust. She thought it was a big step for them.

Now it is Cheryl and Troy’s turn. Troy is the one with the blindfold on. Cheryl is telling him how to step. In confessional Cheryl says that she realizes that Troy is just one step away from being able to fall into the pool but it is okay, he has a life jacket on. He’s a big boy. (wow, that was cold)

Simon is the one blindfolded and he is dragging Kacie down the stairs to the pool. Iyanla makes him stop and has Kacie walk away and talk him over to her. Iyanla asks if he will let her lead him now. They do the assignment but when Kacie tells him to walk slow so he speeds up. In confessional Simon says that he doesn’t show emotion to Kacie because he never saw that happen between his parents.

They all talk about what they got out it and then when they are done they all get up to leave and Simon stays seated. Cheryl asks him if he is coming and he tells her it is isolation time. We see Kacie laying on her bed and Rhonda goes out to Simon and tells him that he needs to tell Kacie, “I need a little time to process all this, I will come back in a few minutes.” Rhonda tells him that he needs to tell her that so she doesn’t feel he has left her.

Simon calls his sister and finds out that his parents are upset that they have not gotten any time with their daughter Amira. Simon is upset and Kacie says that she will call Sylvia (I think that is her sister) and tell her that Simon’s parents want to see Amira. They are starting to get upset and Simon is flipping through his journal looking for his notes from Dr. Stan on how to talk to each other and Kacie asks him if he wants to call one of the life coaches to ask them how they need to proceed.

Troy, Cheryl, Jaclyn and Michael are talking in one of the other rooms. It is very relaxed. Cheryl is telling them that their son slept in bed with them until he was 8 yrs. old.

Lou and Jen meet with Rhonda to talk about the “elephant in the front room”. Which is the things you hope if you ignore them they will go away. They discuss how Jen doesn’t trust Lou’s instincts with their daughter and they have a good session.

Iyanla meets with Simon and Kacie. They called her about Amira. Iyanla asks why they called and Simon says that Dr. Stan had told him a way for them to talk to each other and he couldn’t remember how. In confessional Simon says that he didn’t want to tell Iyanla what the issue was, he just wanted her to tell him how to talk to Kacie. Simon tells her that a family member was upset that they hadn’t had time with Amira. Kacie tells her that they decided before they came where their daughter would stay. Iyanla tells Simon that he didn’t want to discuss this with Kacie, he just wanted her to do what he wanted. Kacie is talking to him and he is looking at his lap and Kacie asks him what she just said and he laughs and asks her to say it again. Kacie gets really upset. She says that this is really disrespectful and she doesn’t like it. Iyanla explains to Kacie that Simon is unable to process everything she says. She tells her that she thinks the problem is that when Kacie was young she was not heard when she needed to be, so when Simon doesn’t hear her it triggers that anger and fear in her. Iyanla has them tell each other that they can do this.

Lou and Jennifer get to smash the paper mache elephant when they are done.

It is time for another group. They talk about what their core needs are and how if they are not met it triggers fear.
At the end of group Rhonda asks if anyone has gotten their respect bracelets given to them yet and no one has. Then she hands out bracelets that say communicate on them and Jen says that she wants to give Lou his now. She says that he got down on one knee earlier proposed to her. She said that she had been the one to propose to him. She gets all emotional.

After group Simon and Kacie are in the bathroom and Simon tells her that he is going to go do some thinking and Kacie responds that he is going to isolate himself and he asks her if she wants to come then and she doesn’t answer him. So he just goes anyway.

Iyanla meets with Michael alone. She asks what his relationship is like with his mother. He tells her that he chooses not to have one with her because he doesn’t respect her because of how she treated his dad. Iyanla tells him that he will never have a healthy relationship with any woman until he forgives his mother. She puts handcuffs on him and asks him if he is willing to let Jaclyn go if it means staying locked in the cuffs. It takes a while but he finally says he is.
Iyanla goes and gets Jaclyn and she puts a leash onto his handcuffs and they talk about what it all represents. Iyanla tells Jaclyn that Michael has something to say to her. Michael tells her that he is willing to walk away from her if this is how he has to live.

Preview-
Jaclyn is up at BOR and she could be asked to leave. Rhonda is in Troy’s face about being spoiled. Kacie has another melt down and Iyanla is telling her that it is manipulation.

So there is week one of Couples SO! I will post Monday's spoiler late Friday or early Saturday morning.
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So that's it from TVgal for now.....hugs..........Earthmomma

I dont know who tvgal is, but I think I'm in love

Thanks! I feel kind of weird not having TVGals permission yet. Its like I'm breaking a rule or something. I hope she gives us permission to have her spoilers posted here. I just loved reading these so much.


Amanda

Thanks for Thursday and Friday's spoilers very detailed thanks again earthmomma.

uh yes you should feel bad. I am tvgal and I can't use my regular tvgal name since it is registered here already for someone else. You know I check my pm's multiple times daily. You could have waited. You signed up on Andrew's board for the single reason to take my spoilers.
Do you know that I literally spent two HOURS typing that up last night? And that is why I am not coming to these boards. You could have waited one day or probably less to get my permission. THAT is the part that ticks me off. I do NOT get paid to do these. I do them for fun. Last year I was crucified by some on the mother board so I decided to keep them in Andrew's board where I have been for months and have never seen a single fight on that board. Thank you for making me feel better now about not wanting to share.
Its called plagerism (sorry if I spelled it wrong).

I KNEW it was a bad idea. Now she is NEVER going to give anyone permission to repost here.