Starting Over Talk - Peer Coaching Support Site

I really do not think Jaclyn is phony at all. I really can identify with her her a lot (not when it comes to the looks thing though I wish!). Shes 23 and I am 19, about 8 months ago I was in her situation not relationship wise but not being with honest with yourself and others.

I was completely breaking down during this show today because I know how she feels. Society these days especially when you are a young girl puts so much pressure on you. I always tried to strive for perfection and play a part that I thought people would like not to be mean or fake but because I felt so worthless,unlovable, and inadequate that the only way I thought I could be liked was to put on a facade.

The hardest thing was actually realizing thats what you were doing and that you were not only other people but yourself. Like Iyanla told Jacyln she was found out, I was found out to. I know I am getting to personal but I know what this feels like and it is very scary and incredibly lonely like she said. She has to learn to prioritize and get to know herself it's a scary process but it isn't impossible.

Sorry if I got too personal I just read some of you thought she was just on here for TV. I really think she is for real she just doesn't know any better and is trying to "people please".

I agree. Watching Jaclyn just reminds me of a girl who's always been expected to be perfect. It happens too often, parents have money, she does well in school, she's a nice person, and she's beautiful. Anyone would crack under the pressure. And the sad thing is, girls like that usually end up with the worst self-esteem. Nothing they do seems to be good enough.

Frankly, if I was in the house for this boot-camp I'd cry 24/7 too.

2cents wrote:

QUOTE:
If I hear one more time from the coaches that Jackie needs to do this or that or he'll leave you:dry: :S ...he did cheat on her..that isn't easy to just get over:angry: or are they gonna address that???<br><br>Post edited by: 2cents, at: 2005/09/24 06:57

Yeah he cheeated but good grief. He's sorry and he's accepted his punishment for a year now. Cut the guy a break. They are both young. He made a mistake. He apolgized for it. I doubt it will happen again. Yes Jaclyn was hurt. We've all been hurt before. She needs to pick herself up and decide that living in the past is not working for her. She's needs to stop pointing the finger and stop waiting for everyone to feel sorry for poor Jaclyn. She's not the first person to get hceated on and she won't be the last. And hello...they aren't even married! The fact that Michael has stuck around this long to "do his time" speaks a lot for his maturity. The fact that Jaclyn wants to continue being the victim speaks volumes about hers.

I agree with you about the crap in your 20s, supermom. I am 29 and still trying to get over some of my crap, but it was so much worse when I was Jaclyn's age. I feel very lucky to have my husband because he really helped me get through a lot of it. I think a lot of it comes from what Mandy said

QUOTE:
a girl who's always been expected to be perfect. It happens too often, parents have money, she does well in school, she's a nice person, and she's beautiful. Anyone would crack under the pressure. And the sad thing is, girls like that usually end up with the worst self-esteem. Nothing they do seems to be good enough.

I find myself in this catergory along with the fact that my family wasn't supportive but expectorant. I needed to know that I was ok no matter what I chose for my life, not a cough syrup*.

*expectorant - cough syrup

duplicate, edited by admin4<br><br>Post edited by: hsmom, at: 2005/10/01 00:23

I don't think it's right to try to teach sexy moves to a woman who hasn't gotten over being raped. All that's going to say to her is that her body is there for the pleasure of a man. She needs to regain her own control before she can offer herself up again.